Democracy “JUST OK” Revenge – Better Ways Available As Well: Bilawal Zardari

Oxford, England — Bilawal Zardari, who will soon be handed the reigns of Pakistan’s biggest political party, addressed the media representatives and had arranged the press briefing to primarily express his views on the budget for 2011-2012. The Co-Chairperson of Pakistan People’s Party, Bilawal Zardari Bhutto had invited the press representatives at his Dubai residence.

Bilawal Zardari said “I am sure the current budget will take care of the needs of the poor.” Answering a question, Bilawal told the media reps that, “I did try to go through the document that was sent to me by Finance Minister Mr. Abdul Hafeez Sheikh, but since my major wasn’t finance I didn’t get a word of the thing. But I gave it to my driver, he is a guru with these financial things, and he said it was cool.” Mr. Zardari/Bhutto, due to this assessment, told the media that he has complete faith that the Finance Minister will deliver. In regards to concerns about President Zardari’s nick name and how it will affect the current budget, Bilawal Zardari Bhutto said that he was very disappointed in the Pakistani media for portraying his Co-Chairperson of Pakistan People’s Party and the President of Pakistan without respect. “You know, I am hurt. I was hurt the first time I heard that name… Mr. Ten Percent. It felt awkward. You know you can’t really put a label on what he is doing to- FOR the country… Pakistani media has not done a good job at this… at all.”

Speaking about democracy in Pakistan, Bilawal said, “You know in the last couple of years, I have grown older and I have grown wiser. And well, I have come to a conclusion that democracy is… well let’s just say it’s over-rated.” Bilawal said that he was all for democracy as long as Pakistan People’s Party kept winning. “…but honestly, I think there are much better ways to take revenge than democracy. Don’t get me wrong, I am all for democracy and I think its cool, but I have to disagree that it is the best revenge. After Musharraf left Pakistan I started thinking that we could’ve cut his balls off (he lol-ed), and that would symbolise how he had no balls to stand up to Americans or the Taliban … or we could’ve just poked his eyes out just for funsies. See what I mean? Totally could’ve exacted revenge on his ass in so many different ways. But you know, we did this for mom and so all is fine.”

Expressing his views on the current wave of terrorism and violence that has taken over Karachi, Bilawal Zardari Bhutto said that he was not shocked at the PNS Mehran incident. “These guys had it coming for a long time. I could just tell. I don’t know how but I kinda knew it way before they did that these terrorists are going to be all up in their business.” Bilawal added that he has upped his privacy settings on Facebook, and all his friends are now required to blur out his face from their pictures before posting it to their respective walls on Facebook. Bilawal ended the press briefing by saying, “It’ll be OK. Dad says so.”